I remember my first trip to a male strip club. It was in Montreal, and I was traveling with my best friend and podcast co-host Matthew Thomas. And while it didn’t quite meet our expectations, I was amazed by the confidence that the dancers embodied. It takes guts to get up on stage, dance and bare it all.
The only thing scarier is doing that very same thing – dancing and stripping – for a boyfriend or lover.
Today’s Himeros.tv video is titled The Dancer and features Dalton Briggs and Cade Maddox. You can watch a free preview or join Himeros.tv for the full video.
With his chiseled body and muscular ass, Cade seduces Dalton while dancing in a cabin hideaway. It’s a show for Dalton’s eyes only. Cade gives Dalton a taste and a touch of this and of that – but pulls away each time. Dalton will get Cade – eventually – but it will be on Cade’s terms.
It’s gorgeous to watch, but why is it so hard to dance for someone you love? It has to do with vulnerability.
On one hand, you know that your boyfriend is into you because… well, he’s your boyfriend. He’s attracted to you. You’ve already won him over. In other words, a sexy dance or striptease shouldn’t be that scary, right? What could go wrong with a little vulnerability?
In my opinion, some of that apprehension is well-founded. During a future fight or disagreement, our loved ones can weaponize our insecurities and use them against us; the people closest to us know how to hurt us most deeply. Vulnerability can be risky business.
And yet, few things are sexier than a guy who looks vulnerability in the face – and does it anyway. As Brené Brown once said, “What makes you vulnerable makes you beautiful.” When a man makes himself vulnerable, he is trusting you to be kind, gentle and loving with his heart. And he’s recognizing that vulnerability is the pathway to deeper connection.
Vulnerability is the life source of relationships. It is also scary as fuck. This is the paradox of love.
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